Twitter Witches Association

Egbe eleye twitter (Twitter witches/wizards Association)

I just decided to post what we discussed in our last (Hierarchy only) meeting as it might be beneficiary to some of you

Venue: Agbede meji TL ati DM ( In between TL and DM)

Time: 01:00 CWT ( Central Witches Time)

Participants:

DaFBI- EiyeLee (Executor)

Amazingdolbaby- Eiyewura (Head Witch)

Emillz- Eiyewizzy (Blood keeper)

Cutietimmie: Eiyerewa ( Time Keeper)

KennyLlyod: Eiyeshaye ( Drummer)

Iambabycackes: Eiyeshayo ( Blood Sucker)

Eiyewura- (Shouts) Eyin Eleye twitter o!

All others- O!!!

Eiyewura- Eyin Eleye mi o!

All others- O!!!

Eiyewura- Eyin Eleye aiye o!

All others- O!!!

Eiyewura- Eiyewizzy o!

Eiyewizzy- o! Mami o

Eiyewura- How much blood do we have left?

Eiyewizzy- We still have almost 3 full storex and eiyeshayo is yet to deposit the one she sucked this week

Eiyewura- bla bla bla... How much blood do we have you're telling me eiyeshayo shey kini kan, mtcheew olofofo eleye, nkan ti mba bere lowo ni ko daun

Eiyewizzy- E ma binu iya!

Eiyewura- mtcheew, Eiyeshayo my dear 

Eiyeshayo- o! Iya wa o

Eiyewura- omo mi, eiye a gbe e, oni shi eje mu, eje to ma run wa ninu oni gbe wa o 

Eiyeshayo- Ase eleye o! Iya, i was able to suck 1 full storex last week and it is at d back yard already

Eiyewura- A da fun e omo mi! Eiyerewa, yeye oge mi, i have noticed that your sexy eyes going up and down, u've just been staring at Eiyelee lataro kilode!

Eiyerewa- Blushes* Maami u too sabi things, Eiyelee is just looking too gbaski this night and i know even you too would admit, i have noticed you too eyeing him 

Eiyewura- lol* Oni baje omo, ewo oju e bi ti ibo, onirikuri, oloju Tinubu, y must u see everything sef? Abi u want me to blind you?

Eiyerewa- mama, if you blind me how we go know time? 

Eiyewura- oh! That is why you're still seeing stupid girl, abi u think i dont know? 

Eiyerewa- Sorry mama

Eiyewura- Sorry for yourself... Who has anything to say before we do closing prayer

Eiyerewa- *Stands up* I met a guy last week ... (Eiyeshayo whispers, naso her own be, witch hoe) he was soooo cute and loaded

Eiyewura- So have you brought him for donation?

Eiyerewa- Haba iya! You want to die? I had to run when he almost killed me

Everybody- Ha!!! Kiloshele?

Eiyerewa- He released a heavy shot that almost cut off my wings

Eiyeshaye- How bad was the shot

Eiyerewa- He told me " I sea the Love in your eyes"

EiyeLee- Ewooo!!! *Draws sword* where is he?

Eiyewura- Alagbara Obo, na there we go find you, ordinary chicken you cant kill o, but if it concerns eiyerewa you start having muscle-pull! Ashewo jati jati

Eiyeshayo- Mama, There's 1 guy asking me for blow-job and i dont want to suck his blood, what can i do? (Eiyerewa whispers; Bitch)

Eiyewura- Ashewo, when u carry mouth like mosquito why wont they ask you for BJ?! See, let me tell you, you cant suck his dick without sucking his blood, just give him hand-job shikena! And if he no gree carry him blood give am wetin he want. DazAll

Everyone- Mama o!!!

Eiyewura- I am tired, am going to work tomorrow and 1 guy has been Dm'n me since... Eiyeshaye and Eiyewizzy should give us music

Both- o mama!

Eiyewizzy- Mic check, hello tueh teuh, 1 2, 1 2, 1 2!

Eiyeshaye- haba eiyewizzy u wan give us moyes luck?

Eiyewizzy- Ha! God forbid o! Gimme beat make i just freestyle...

Eiyeshaye starts drumming, eiyewizzy starts rapping and everyone else begins dancing *lights out*. 

By @DaFBI

ARTICLE ON NELSON MANDELA by @Don_Segxi

Yesterday, I received a phone call from a friend in South Africa, she said 3 words "Mandela is dead". I initially rejected the notion and went on the world wide web to try get more information, however subsequent calls and messages affirmed it and it was already being broad-castedon the TV.

At that point various eulogy's/admonitions and the likes were already in full throng.

However, one nagging thought I couldn't get off my mind was "Are we ready ?".. "Are we ready for the death of a 95year old man ?".. This was affirmed more while scrolling through my facebook wall, I saw a post by someone which read "RIP Mandela, died too soon". I did reply saying he was 95years old but writing this, I realize the "poster" might have shared the same line of thought as me.

Mandela left office in 1998, making no public appearance till 2010, however he has unfortunately been plagued with bouts of illness since then, (one might expect a 92 year old man to be stronger ?).

Also, I remember sometime this year, when he was reportedly rushed to the hospital and had to be placed in the ICU. Sometime last week also, I was reading an interview excerpt granted by a member of the family, she said it was painful seeing him just lying there, that they'd had to keep him sterile as his body was susceptible to viruses. He was virtually living off life support.

These precedents goes to show that it was only a matter of time before the inevitable happened. There was a great premonition. However, like every other thing African, we didn't prepare.

Mandela wears size 54, do we have a person that wears size 12 ?. Over the last decade, we've seen Malala in Asia, Obama in America and Africa ?.. Well.....

Mandela is gone now, leaving the continent without a moral leader especially at a time of great unrest across the continent. However, in his death, he might just be able to do that which was difficult while alive, raising a new crop of African leaders based on values that he eschewed as I want to believe his death might be a source of inspiration to folks across the continent to live a life worthy of note.

Till then, I only hope African doesn't rot as we still have some empty shoes to fill.

RIP Nelson Mandela, Gone too soon.

-Olusegun Joseph

Integrity Development Organization.

A poem from My Heart

A poem from My Heart

I look at the sky and i see no stars

I go to lay on my bed and i realise even the sky is all by itself sometimes

How lonely it can be without the moon and the stars

Whenever i look into your eyes, a passion burns deep within me and my heart longs for a magical healing conjured by just your touch

Am scared of my thoughts and the things i hope you're not, cos i heard enough for me to take-off, from friends and close-ones, mostly the negative stuffs and i ask my self if i listen to them 'what about the Positive stuff' i think of "Mother love" the mother of all love and i realise, they're just tryna murder Love!

I burn silently with my thoughts, trying to figure what is what and what is not, silently hoping for your love. Only God knows how you made a nigga so soft!

I know you might have been through a lot and my experience might not be enough, but together we can weather the storm and our Love would be just enough

Behind your eyes i see your fears, and i hope never to see your tears, but truth be told, life ain't fair so i wanna sing music to your ears and kiss your tears. 

Something so familiar yet so strange I forgot to remember I love you.I was ready to be clean for but yet so dirty, I acted so ascend to be so descend so gulity digging innocent… you were present in the past and absent in the future. My love for you will never grow old. victory was to defeat my hope cause I knew you would never love me but the vain was to keep me modest. To think complicated thoughts was just like a fish out of the water don’t know where to go without you. My love was like an open secret, my bark was worse and my bite tears in heaven as I captured them, as I push myself towards the end another round comes in and as I speed my time seconds are just sitting. Spend my time on thinking, deciding, confused and most of all being trapped.. I tried to pull the words “AM OKAY “but the chain in between kept on breaking I tried to be the cover of my own book but it kept on raining. My silence is just another words of my pain, its just the sadness behin my happiness. As I close my eyes and think about you...


Exclusively for @cutietimmie

Twitter New year Resolution!

Ehn-ehn!!!

Out of boredom, i decided to write something, 

It's so amazing how u discover ur talent when u're hungry, a lot of people are yet to discover their talent thereby wasting in different fields *tonto, nd sina rambo's sub tho*  

Lemme say a quick prayer *in TB joshua's voice* "the type of hunger that would make u discover ur talent!!! May it "hungry" u IJN!

Oya back to the matter jare, what shall we discuss today? *cracks brain*

I think @cutietimmie would be a good idea but on second thoughts i'ld let it pass (Still wanna set P with oda girls)! 

I think we should talk about how the new year would look like, "should we expect more bomb-blast, more kidnapping, air disasters, road accidents, civil war, prominent politicians death, celebrity deaths and many more as different men of God prophesied them???

I pray none of them would affect my family and urs IJN!!! Lemme hear a loud amen

Now to the good part, so many of u made different new year resolutions, " I must buy a car, i must build my house, i will do this nd that" So many resolutions, some peoples new year resolution was to "get more followers" *sad* But the one which interest me most is the "I MUST GET MARRIED THIS YEAR" resolution!

Some girls were in church on new years eve praying for a guy that would marry them this year and still didn't answer guys try'n to set P with them *na war o*

Abeg to all this single ladies forming "sister caro" me i want to eat rice o!!! And even some guys too @PRODEEGY @RIPfaceboook @Don_Segxi @iamEMILLz @A_Kory_A nd co, I want to chop rice abeg, make una do quick! 

And again sef @cutietimme called me twice this year already, after series of "i'll call u" without calling last year! I can feel this year is gon be good, may even lead to "saturday rice" sef  *holds laff*

U know there's no way uncle jona wont get into my article "Bros J(no be Jesus o) abeg do wetin u wan do quick comot that office, @least we already have it in record that a "retard" once ruled us, cos i dont understand your govt, especially on this subsidy ish! But am sure God understands sha! 

Lemme just pause so i wont start my new year with headache!

And before i go happy New Year and i wish y'all a wonderful 2013! 

                 

                                          FBI

Le' Misery

This is actually my first blog ever, pardon any mistake biko!!!!


RT @cutietimmie: Sowi..lol"@DaFBI: *sobs* RT @cutietimmie: Femi o!!!lmao"@DaFBI: X_X RT @cutietimmie: Huh?"@DaFBI: I wont forget the #FirstTimeIMet ...

*blows catarrh*

Oya lemme tell u of le' misery, i have a very complicated issue...


HAVE BEEN ZONED!!!! :'(

RT @cutietimmie: @DaFBI...g,u makin me ROTFLMAO

Not to the Bro zone or friends zone (that would have been better), it is a new specially created zone just for me!!! (She calls me G! I wonder which zone that is)

Oya lemme tell u the story gangan'

I met temmy last year in osogbo, (the girl popular pass OYES 4 osogbo) she is popularly know as temmy pink, i met her through her bestie lola... Blah blah blah

D problem know is i have a crush on her, the type of crush caterpillar sef no fit crush, the type of crush that would make Mr ibu suit-up and make a speech like obama (u dig?) The problem now is she doesn't even know i exist! *sobs*
The only time she remembers me is when i mention her, the last time i saw her, her brain had to go into over-drive before she remembered me

*sobs harder*

To add sand to my garri, she told me she's in love with a lesbian

*Grabs bucket* :'(

Le' misery that i am in is 1 Honourable president Jonathan has to set-up a committee to look into for the nations benefit, cos the type of love i have for temmy is the type of love we need in this country. It is the type of love that can make a girl leave her fathers mansion in Abuja nd stay in a room with a guy in Mushin, the type of love that would have saved our dear "ugonna, tekena, llyod and chidiaka" (RIP #aluu4) *sobs*
The type of love that would make Nigerians applaude our dear first lady when next she says "My fellow widows" (i hope the apple would have been delivered by then), the type of Love that can make a unilag girl soak garri with a guy (not man).

Anyway this is the type of love i have for temmy, which she aint even aware of *sobs*

So i think the govt needs to look into le' misery so @least they would achieve something in 4yrs!!!

I can't takes this anymore!!!!! *grabs rope* nah! This rope is too thick!!!

YES!!! Before i go *CONGRATS TO BARACK OBAMA * i hope i'ld be able to get that visa this year (have been applying since i was 4yrs)

BREAKING NEWS: *whispers* I heard aunty patience has also zoned bro Jona! *dont say i didn't "told" u o!